Dealing with life's tough moments
Does happiness often feel unattainable?
- Duration 7:09
- Date Apr 6, 2012
Does happiness often feel unattainable?
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And Easter week and a holy week is a reminder that you know that light struggles hard times.
Pain and suffering all of them in and can rob you of your happiness but Kay Warren co-founder of saddleback church and wife of senior pastor Rick Warren.
Has some advice on how to find that silver lining and she explains in her new book -- joy because happiness isn't enough and Kaye joins me.
Here on the set and we're so lucky to have her here in in New York talk about.
Never welcome first -- -- -- -- -- -- how saddleback not doing doing great to an awesome a great wonderful community that she joy.
Because happiness isn't enough because you're implying that there is a difference between joy and happiness what is that difference there is a huge difference -- the -- is just.
Has just released their happiness.
Report in its all around economics and that just highlights to -- the difference because happiness comes and goes.
You know your health changes.
Use somebody you love doesn't love you anymore.
Economic times do you go up and down.
External things change in our lives and so our happiness can't be based on that it'll just go out the window scouted -- and the more stable which I can buy his joy.
Happiness is external joy is in turn.
But using joy and sorrow are actually linked.
They how -- well you know we tend to think that our life comes in hills and valleys and if there's good times and there's bad times peaks valleys.
But I really think -- more realistic way to look at it is it's like to parallel train tracks.
That there's a track of joy and -- -- track of sorrow in our lives at all times and -- they're both running and ends probably next to each other throughout our lives so it's not like you can always have everything great or everything's always bad news -- it's always the next even in the most joyous times it's just that little knowledge you know it's not perfect.
And even in the worst of times they're still beauty and joy and love in the world so.
There's this as soon as we understand that I think can embrace a more balanced approach is -- just looking for happy.
Because it didn't happen yet and it just it's it disappears not gonna -- the other is because they don't -- we will look at it and say how could she.
You have any unhappiness that she preaching -- but it what happened is when she's got.
You know a huge church in Southern California and in your husband Rick Warren both -- the you know the what thirty coming having millions -- it billion billion resilience as books of that purpose driven life -- things are looking pretty good for you I mean but.
Honestly I think that you have not always have good times well.
And that just goes to the point -- extras yes I have a great marriage I love where we live violent our church there's been a great ministry but it's just not enough because it doesn't last I mean Rick could die tomorrow and I mean I've already gotten used twice in my life that -- had cancer and you know we have -- -- our -- whose struggles with major depression and and so it's not about the external has got to be something else for -- to hang -- That's deeper and that's more solid and what we tend to do and in our hopes for joy are very fragile regularly place him in people and where we live and our job and what we own column that can can disappear.
Change get broken.
It's just not enough you called on Jesus in the book a man of -- and which it runs counter to -- Isiah really calls -- he does so.
Explain that to jesus' -- have.
Sort of well Alice in that was a great insight from me it it actually helps me to choose.
To seek a life of joy when I realized that Jesus was also and -- a joint.
Because Jesus is god and god is joy if if there's -- doing this universe it's because god is -- of losing eleven universe it's because got his -- so with Jesus in his absence and he was was joyful.
When he came to earth he took on a roll which was the -- -- -- as he did come to die he came to suffer.
So that was what that was kind of mission that was his job but who he wise in on the inside in his -- he's -- -- man -- joy.
And that's it that encourages me and tells me that that I can be joyful in the middle of sorrow as well it I don't have to be.
Overcome by the hard times that you say you -- to adopt a value system of -- what's -- -- system of heaven because.
In this in this pluralistic world we've got a lot of different values out there wanted to religions have a different importance with the points and -- -- so.
What is of value system of happen by any of the Bible teaches -- the value system of heaven is to look through the lens of eternity we get -- the living.
Really just in the temporary -- -- what's happening to me today.
Know what the weather's like outside what I ate today it's it's all about what's happening right now.
And win we live at that level.
When bad things happen to us -- painful things happen to -- joy can disappear but if we've developed a perspective that says there's something more than this life which is the Bible teaches there is life beyond this life there is eternity.
That so much of what's wrong and broken here will be made right in eternity when we adopted that value system -- -- values justice over injustice he values mercy over judgment he values love over apathy -- when we when we.
Live our lives through that lens.
Then we take a long view of our lives rather than just the short term which focuses on what's happening now.
And the long view is -- -- is.
You know there are a lot of people who -- For then you know there is -- others to christianity there is no eternity.
-- mean even people who are sort of people of faith they have a hard time living out the idea that there is some kind of unity in the here now really is.
Our own audio and -- will constantly and eternity is just sort of this week sort of background noise now.
How do you actually.
And live out the idea that there's an attorney that you're looking for and not just to -- Well it.
It takes a conscious intention -- I think did it for me it is -- bringing myself back to the what is that I value what is -- I believe about god.
I think that we operate out of our beliefs we can we get it backwards we think well if I'm feeling poorly -- feeling depressed I'm feeling down.
I need to just stop feeling that way -- that's pretty impossible but we have to do is go back to our thoughts and because our thoughts.
Determine our feelings so -- in my -- in my mind I have the convictions and -- -- that got Israel.
-- -- that eternity matters and that I really am going there's some day.
Then that starts to affect the way I feel so it's not just about changing.
What I believe and what I think is gonna change how I feel so the question the answer that question is you and I -- to have a pretty solid.
Conviction in -- mind what we believed to be true and then from that our feelings flow.
-- -- of of the book is called choose joy because happiness.
And the author Kay Warren so much for being -- thank you happy Easter happy Easter to --