@PaulMecurio sits down with Brian
Comedian Paul Mecurio gives Brian his hilarious take on today’s political news.
- Duration 17:13
- Date Aug 2, 2012
Comedian Paul Mecurio gives Brian his hilarious take on today’s political news.
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This transcript is automatically generated
With -- -- studio full mercurial back from I don't know a series of appearances -- stage shows -- applause you -- since you came back.
We have a new studio so now for you don't have to reach you.
Your Lackey threw it just looks like a Star Trek panel like I can I can shoot -- -- yes I couldn knob and get a pick up next I know exactly so we were every bit.
I've been a touring and been I was out in LA are gonna show that I developed that's got we so to a network so we're.
Excited about that's those -- at their for a couple weeks actually about a month and then I was -- that fox was performing at their -- in the city have been all over and I -- at -- time in my family which is civilian employment would be so -- like crazy -- -- -- -- -- -- -- host hosts a show like come -- he makes fun -- because I don't know what -- not it is and my -- -- my -- -- he really just have to spend time of them and I just wanted to strip clubs but anyway.
Yes or aggregate time this summer playing golf -- them -- -- and are you watching the Olympics and I love the Olympics and love I love.
Did that this story that I love that just came out was that does -- Saudi Arabian woman you know Saudi Arabia three countries like -- -- -- in another country but trying to show they're progressives in the -- Women be and that's a senator as one woman and she's a heavyweight judo person with a blue belt.
About two -- a blue belt you get the ball when you're ten that's not even about and admit that congress US that she wanted to Wear her her achieved ahead dressed for religious reasons.
And it -- that no because it was a it was a safety issue.
And then they allowed is an exception and and my thing is like.
Look she didn't even have to compete in the Olympic trials to get -- and she's just because she's a woman for Saudi Arabia Lebanon and I would be of -- Byron Olympic athlete who went to compete.
It should be the same for everybody and you know the bottom line is that he's trying to show how progressive they are in Saudi Arabia.
You're not a progressive country when your athletes look at the Olympic starts ago where's the effigy our response -- burning -- hundred -- -- the bush don't.
Did anyone bring Deborah George Bush actually did say it should look it's June oh she's never competed -- -- -- -- of -- safety issue with a headdress.
-- you don't ever competed at the Olympics that's the safety issue right there.
Early experiences tying -- blue -- that's it.
Well this incident as it gets worse they also insisting that she gets a chaperone to stand by the -- because women are allowed to -- that -- chaperone and she usually.
And is due to -- few in Saudi Arabia how do you defend yourself against maiming and not allowed to even look him in the guy like that is at war and a you can't drive to get your gold medal you Sarah and exactly what she's one piece of fabric away from being in the -- that -- has an unfair advantage like you have some information -- -- -- -- -- -- she'll be pleased with -- it was a short time ago -- two weeks when Taylor Harrison.
Sat down as a US Olympic champion in hopes of Ian Gold medalist in judo.
I'm very topic and she -- a a real tough upbringing.
I had a hard time with a coach and okay she was sexually abused by their coach overcame it -- and now she's become.
The first woman.
Gold medalist in the history of blood judo competition it's great yeah 172 pounds.
She is going to be -- our our coaches -- Olympic legend.
-- -- so -- gradually -- that has just happened that's great she pledged to come back.
As soon as she went so she might even appear doing our show wow even though and you're out your history -- god -- has -- you know she give you -- chop and you'd be out no she's just more important.
I mean that's building.
That the other guy diversity just have a -- -- badminton.
So in -- and South Korea China.
And Indonesia right have been throwing matches.
Because they don't like to draw the next round that if they lose they'll actually do better.
But they even making close to don't -- -- just I felt like Jacqueline -- is throwing fight against she's Robin could.
Just sitting there that is anticipated -- -- exactly crowded news today.
Now it's like -- first surprise and ready carpenters who watches that it goes bullish there does it witnesses witnesses say it -- -- like up close what is it.
It's I -- she get into it easier draw it's bad and they look the anabolic steroid it up too bad -- and -- for bad.
Right the only thing that Greg Louganis -- a great point the other day they said what about these Chinese women that are winning by five seconds.
Which is -- possible.
Are they wearing thin if they in the water they have giant feet and -- this is one yeah she ended whose late late sixties she is she -- yes she when he I don't really care and that she's done.
-- A lot the -- line now I don't have listeners did you start at the Chinese don't care you -- -- it.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- and -- clearly if you are good you'll still be done.
But ball but as we aren't Titus is a formal radio show it I apologize and what do you where did you -- did you wrestle with smooth lines like there.
It was on the -- the -- and January I -- last -- the strongest human being I've ever.
And ET as he's the sweat it did the sweat ambassador for high.
It's definitely yeah it's it's as you'll regret opening -- But as I was saying is that the -- the Chinese have to be juicy and I love the fact that we are so.
We are so savvy now the minute she touched that that's the railing and one ago.
-- -- -- -- -- is its candidate in the coming up in the pool is -- is she ticked off.
Right back up.
No she took a big risk just by being born female in China -- -- -- are completely out of it surviving just that she is she's a good swimmer because -- is that maybe they don't want any through into the -- says he had the Yellow River yeah our little river whatever it was.
I think it's gonna be a -- in Korea you know what I mean I don't know I find so let's talk about this.
Harry Reid I just as speaker Boehner this yes -- name dropping from the littlest irresponsible things that I can remember happening.
As majority leader Harry Reid comes out and says.
Yeah I was just talking to investor at Bain Capital.
And he said Mitt Romney hasn't paid taxes in ten years and how -- -- -- I think it's true -- a really and if it's true.
His father George Romney delay to a -- army should be embarrassed for his son -- okay.
Where does that come from first of all.
If it's fact say it's fact that it's not keep -- amounts -- -- -- -- and it's complete hearsay and it makes him look it looks that makes it Democrats look petty and desperate.
And I keep defending Romney -- the guy alone so he made a lot of money and you know what people keep forgetting and it was.
It was it was not even Romney was someone -- at the -- at that he is he the money that he inherited from his father.
He donated all of you -- -- donated millions of dollars I wouldn't do that you do that you take money from little children on the street I would save money did your parents -- I would keep it for myself.
And made a lot of money and now -- release your tax turns.
I would not be surprised if he paid very little in taxes you know what.
If there are loopholes and you figured it out with your people god bless you if you don't like the system moved to the woods.
You know -- jar and don't have electricity but don't but like you you can't have it both ways and like we live in a system where people are Smart enough and -- enough money.
To figure out how to get the most out of the system so why doesn't he's not qualified to be present let's focus on the guys qualification as a former curious of the top up and coming comic relief coming -- -- -- -- and yes of becoming common from years ago is more desirable than poll we Kerio the headlining comment.
Who has a show and ready to launch in Los Angeles thank you very you have much more -- -- much more understandable and relatable.
When you work.
Struggling or rising price as opposed to when you arrive present or not acknowledging the process and -- time energy and focus it took to get exactly I mean you know why don't we focus on affected Obama donated 5000 series video of him on the computer donating money to his old self made it back here is is Jon Stewart.
-- about this last night on The Daily Show.
I don't think any image.
Associated with campaign finance is quite -- sad.
As this one it's the president of the United States sitting alone with his laptop.
To his own presidential campaign.
I wanna make sure that folks know that I'm not just talking the talk I'm walking -- -- quarter.
Most states of America.
Don't don't -- button don't do you -- your email address.
You'll end up expanding the living and out of you.
Any donated 5000 dollars like that's like.
Money that Romney has in his sofa cushions they really -- -- some really key sitting there and is probably goes.
-- -- -- -- -- Hardly interact accurately and some of these employees get really -- is it an end if it's only 5000 -- don't you.
Does that say something about what he thinks about as the Tennessee this unpleasant thing yeah I don't wanna lose their out of my job I've done.
I don't have.
-- -- -- -- Does that give you influence would blow like and you get a handshake with Shelly well listen if it's gonna be is going to be a crazy race you're going to be at the convention of the news -- -- shows.
It is going to be a crazy race because we're going to be there as well gonna hang out right.
Probably a college I can put this week -- one of the -- -- Mansfield crazy and as I'm aware of your reputation if -- seen with me you can never go back to the daily.
I'm just a little warm up monkey over there it's -- show I'm with you I'm.
I'm a liberal -- I work on that show I'm not gonna I'm worried about you -- career.
Because if you why you hanging out with Brian Kilmeade.
And like you security ready for the -- -- -- -- -- I am ready to date but I find.
I hit a bit.
One police officer told us at the hotel.
We're Olympics officials are saying it was supposed to be eighty guard's only two showed that one of them was arrested because he had marijuana.
In his pockets.
It was better when Johnny -- can -- is the responsible guard.
Can imagine what's in the pockets of the other 78 guys who didn't show up.
But the fact that the real.
Norton is really good security trainer.
I was -- with these guys and -- Undercover -- video says his security trainer who thinks nice harness correctly if you had a lot.
You know -- benefits -- about it.
You maybe you can.
Stop all -- two -- three people.
Hey Olympic organizers in Britain idol so you could add to the application B security trainer at the Olympics -- that a little question you've been there.
What do you believe is the acceptable number of stabbings on your watch.
-- -- Anything other than zero.
That was the story before mid round -- took the story over -- people forget about that it to keep your daily show to come up with now it's suspect you know it's -- and they pick on Romney for pointing out the obvious there was already pointed out and it -- unfair you know.
But -- -- I we retirement is unfair in my favorite starting last two hits is that he's in Poland at the tomb of the unknown soldier and this obnoxious reporter yells these questions here here it is cut eleven.
-- First of all that -- yelled a question what do shrill voice call -- -- and narration of that a single forever right left.
What we're aware of decorum lite -- if you wanna -- question ask -- at the appropriate time place and appropriate manner.
This eight presidential.
You're not a -- it -- reporter at LAX try to talk the Kanye West for guys and I understand what I her -- -- -- part of the -- goes.
Kiss my ass this is a holy site.
The irony of that I believe is Jesus say go it's -- It's.
I'm saying it's like beating somebody up for like.
But for saying something bad about Don -- irony of that moment was so awesome I know I'm with you on that in that was -- bad response and that's -- but -- -- Romney was pulling off a perfect stop Lech -- is your -- man he gets a huge crowd there will cheer I gotta go and then this happens I go.
What are you doing.
-- -- it slightly shocked that Lech Walesa the guy who represents you units and all that do you like Scott Walker marrying Norma ray let cool but that whatever.
And governor of Wisconsin and the late less than what I am because who doesn't want an aging 8080s icon what was -- not available -- Doris receiving he's an historic Beijing China that was a really great get for him if that's is that he's yet he won -- -- I mean.
Good way -- you -- -- I'm not.
I -- defending -- I'd like Romney I think this shows look Romney and bush are not that far apart in what both close fairly close this and I mean it that you think yeah Deans in Kentucky dean.
Hey we have not talked about the chick filet study -- -- -- -- Ballots.
But actually I was in Chicago where east Chicago on business scenarios -- in the days and -- the -- particular and I.
Gentlemen -- -- found its its full lane -- left -- and -- can't tell you can't really get a true appreciation for on the TV.
I like about two hours to get my -- and everyone in the line was smile and they were happy they were -- Staging area for the line with like over on the mall -- you -- -- cook a large.
Car Warhol -- trucks were wrong and why behind my line art and talk and he can actually effect in the meal there that that.
-- easy to you don't defeat Rahm Emanuel on there talking about is constituency not you know that make and model on felony must not know he's talked and -- everyone.
In that line -- -- and it.
But ages he totally boomer I tell you exactly and I built this this -- ramp up you know this is true on Monday.
By the gonna have a kiss in -- yet people are gonna go I hope it keeps ramping up like on Tuesday all of us heterosexuals he's going to -- having sex on the -- -- -- you.
You've done that report -- right will be a big deal you've you've done a nasty Burger King right it was a good -- -- are -- very much divisiveness let's please.
Good for the people for going out but do you really have to take our political fights.
-- fast food -- yes they -- everywhere yet.
I just three days and he just went to a fast food place to get heart disease and diabetes.
Well you can still get ball -- that's the beauty of fixed vigilant.
Oh right thanks so much.
-- let's go to Pam in Memphis say -- Pam what's on your mind.
I'm against the faking it going to be at the check volleyed Friday.
Because I had yet to abuse.
-- get rally that would -- what his welfare.
Did do look at.
Doesn't -- Colin Powell -- each other.
I'm probably not only very and I think you know it showed up yesterday.
He go back around 6 o'clock here that's.
And it's still -- -- That they can come he had get.
It didn't strike in.
Light of -- -- company and they can donate his whoever they play at its support that I did.
-- deep probably hailed and they support it -- my.
There was still go to Home Depot whether the -- same six marriage or not.
Band so it deceive you go in there and just.
Kiss your same sex partner you gotta buy something you to buy something and get a little honey mustard -- revenue on your partner -- -- secret -- a secret -- I think that make people.
Very much damn good job -- where you gonna be where we find.
I'm going to be in the city at the comic strip and -- seller here in New York City and and and I'm going to be up to I know it's a long way off October 26 27 that the Gotham comedy club here in New York -- October yes you gotta come -- other seats available scrutiny he's just around the corner of the lower those posts have I have a blood -- then -- people -- hanging out -- the conventions baby.
A minute I you're not -- to be allowed the daily show's take away your back.
Please solvency of FOX & Friends.