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Helping orphans worldwide
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Terry Meeuwsen on finding solutions to and preparing for the challenges of adoption.
- Duration 9:35
- Date Nov 12, 2012
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Terry Meeuwsen on finding solutions to and preparing for the challenges of adoption.
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Now -- in the same way and switch gears over to another interesting story also based.
In Virginia we're gonna swing over to Virginia Beach and talked to Terry -- Houston.
Who is with orphans promise thank you so much for joining us here today Terry.
Thanks -- street to -- with -- and we want to introduce our viewers to you and to your organization.
Orphans promise helping orphans worldwide -- This organization to help parents or anyone thinking about adopting.
Or providing Foster care to children.
With a new -- set DVD video series titled adoption.
And Foster RX solutions for wounded families will help them to find solutions to prepare them for the challenges ahead.
-- you know I know a lot of people who have not considered.
Adoption -- as I was reading some of your notes it really is fascinating.
It's it's not as easy as it sometimes can sound -- -- jealous about.
Talk is about -- organizational what you guys are helping new parents deal.
Well one of the things that happened in the beginning about Laura was.
We really went to my husband and I after adopting three daughters from Ukraine saw that they had friends left behind -- probably weren't going to have families.
So we initially started out with this organization to reach out to older kids were going to age out of orphanages with.
No training and life skills money management.
Just simple things no funds no education that would take them anywhere in life and so pretty hopeless.
Future picture for them.
And then we got to know families who did go and adopt him.
We began to look at the Foster care situation in the United States we have.
400 some thousand kids in the United States of America who need Foster homes right now.
And so we said what can be done to help parents who are going because one of the things that happens when your hardest touched by a child in need -- that you're getting a child.
Who comes from a hard place a troubled background.
And most of us go with hearts open why -- and eyes open wide but we don't necessarily understand what it's gonna take to do that well.
That's the dvd series we said boy if people are gonna have that kind of heart and passion to go.
Let's equip them with information and advice from experts that can help them do this successfully.
For the child for them for their family unit.
You know and listening to that is sounds like at the obvious thing to do and is there or not this type of you know guiding that goes on at right now -- -- before you came up with these dvds with your organization.
Was there you did you just you know get a Foster child adopt child and off you go without any training or maybe counseling.
-- to go without -- is that what you discover.
Well sometimes and at least this -- what happened to us with our adoption.
You have to go through an agency to get a home study done.
And they won't single -- match -- with the social worker that walks through the process with you.
We already had four children when we adopted our daughters and so we thought oh we got this down with parents and the -- where we we know how to do this -- Yet what happened when the kids came -- we hadn't expected.
What the wounded background was going to exhibit in behavior.
And so we just found these experts who deal with families who are struggling every day and we said wouldn't it be great if you could know in advance.
Be prepared had your parenting skills honed and and just be ready to make it a good experience for everybody it is such a fantastic idea and Terry while we're talking to you -- like you to go over we have some.
Full screens that we want to put up to give people an idea of what they'll find on the DVD let's go over -- spur adoption.
And fostering you have a couple bullet points here.
Well we've got all kinds of information in that the dvd.
And you know lots of times what I think is unexpected is that these kids -- offer up behavior that.
Is sometimes you can misconstrue what they're meaning by it hoarding.
-- -- a lot about things but they don't perceive it that way -- sometimes pushing you away and not being able to connect or allow you to love them.
In our situation our girl's parents were not living any longer.
But we had a daughter who really struggled with the fact that if she was gonna love me it was the -- trail to where biological mom -- -- You have to be prepared for all of these things I'll tell you one of the great things that I learned I wish I'd known for us with all of my kids but.
You know in America typically if a child does something wrong we put them in timeout we send them off to a -- -- we we punish them by taking them away from what's happening.
Well what are the experts on the dvd series said what we need to do with children to come from hard places is give them a time -- We need to be -- and say things like you're gonna need to stay in the kitchen with me right now we're gonna make dinner together.
And you connect in with them it's not enough to just be present you need to really beat present.
It's in their lives right at and -- was reading some of these great tips that we had put up on our screen so people could see this.
You change your expectations.
This is tips for adoption and fostering change your expectations learn how to -- parent.
Help your child reconnect.
And when you -- change your expectations.
Is it that sort of what you were just speaking to like changing.
What do you think is gonna happen and -- and be prepared be prepared to be very flexible it sounds like right.
It absolutely and you know it was one of the expert says and I think this is really century sees that this is not a child for a family.
This is a family for a child and so.
You need to be thinking along the line of how can I be used to bring healing into what's missing in this child's life.
Another big part of it is talking with doctor Karen purpose from.
That Texas Christian University where she's the head of child development and she talks about brain development in what happens and a child.
When the typical nurturing an eye to eye contact and love the -- normal family gives to a child that's born into their family is not there.
That it actually affects the development of the brain the good news is.
It's never too late to do that it's never to -- late to have that.
Right side left side connect.
And for a child to become healthy and whole and hear what -- organizations say to parents who knew parents who have adopted were taken in a Foster child.
You know who who have open hearts and open mind and they get started and they get these children and maybe it -- a little more difficult than they thought it was.
And as I was reading through some of your notes.
You know that may be some of the parents start to kind of and re -- think about like did we do the right thing was this the right choice and I mean you're in the situation the -- -- filled out the child in your home.
Now I feel conflicted now what how do you how do counsel people on that.
You know we all have that moment that shocking moment when you realize how big they need is and how insufficient -- going to be by yourself.
You really need to be.
-- a scenario where you're you're in a mentoring group with other people you need to -- have a support team behind you.
You need to know seems like the information that shared on the the adoption and Foster RX beat prepared.
Still your arsenal with everything you can find out and know.
At this -- and I will say this it's not just that we have done something in our family.
For the children that we've adopted they have done something for class and understand that there's some things we need to I have learned what it means is apparent to love unconditionally.
My kids are not there to meet my expectations.
There individuals they're wonderfully and carefully made and part of my job.
Is to help them develop into a whole person -- realizing what they were created for and what their life is supposed to be so.
You know in in many ways it affects the whole family whether there are biological kids now integrating with kids.
-- your bringing in through adoption or Foster care the extended family gets involved in all of that.
It's you really need to have people around you could get it who.
Understand.
Well I now wanted to say this at the top of the interview we but we just got right into it if you you're tuning in watching us right now and our friend Terry looks familiar.
She of course is the current co host of the 700 club.
And also Miss America 1973.
And you know what you what you are doing with this I so many people.
Who are in this world of adoption and and taking in Foster children.
Really appreciate these words and I'm gonna hold up the dvd that we've got here on set with us.
This is adoption and Foster RX solutions for wounded families we want to encourage everyone.
To go to your web -- Terry a nuisance co-founder.
-- -- those orphans promised dot org.
Orphans promised dot org and they can reach out -- you in contact you in your organization if they have any further questions on and also to get more information and and to get this dvd as well right Terry.
Right -- thank you so much for getting this information out there lots of people in America that have.
Very big hearts and very open homes.
We just need to be sure that we're all prepared to be able to invest what we need to -- these children's great information and congratulations to your.
-- -- your family you know you've got five kids and obviously doing a great job and -- words are going to be very much appreciated by people.
That are in this in the world so thank you so much for being with us here today mayor Laura nice to be with you nice to be with -- -- -- thank --