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Happiness deconstructed: Can we be content?

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    How to reach a satisfying life

  • Duration 2:45
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Can we ever.

Beach truly happy well your mind -- could make all the difference according to this new book.

The myths of happiness and were joined by the author and University of California psychology professor Sonia.

Lubomir ski.

Thank -- it's thanks so much for being -- the pleasure to be here so you study what makes people happy and you've looked at basically the pivotal moments in life that we think are going to bring us happy when I get that new job.

When I get married when I have children what did you do.

Governor we'll what I discovered is that people think that -- I'll be happy when those XY and -- things happen but but the problem is that those things -- make us happy but they don't make us happy for as long.

Or four as intensely as we think they will.

-- -- -- -- -- -- -- We adapter get used to positive changes in our lives and then we go back to a previous levels of happiness Disco ball mark.

It -- -- this doesn't last long there's not much of a shelf life and that she keeps it let's try it -- the we have to work harder at it also means that.

When our marriage or our job is not what it used to be that this isn't normal process that we shouldn't create a crisis point out of it.

What what things that you say that is encouraging is that it's our mindset not our circumstances that mattered the most so really you can be.

It going through any thing and be happy.

Yes right and you know obviously you know horribly for -- and tragedies it's hard to be happy among those but.

-- people are remarkably resilient and and it is it is a cliche but happiness is really more something that it resides inside of us.

As opposed to something that's outside of us -- -- say it's the little stuff it's being rather than a major life events it's kind of your daily ups and downs -- end up affecting your mood about let's raise the daily stresses up list hassles you know getting stuck in traffic having to stand in line.

-- I don't know being snubbed by colleague those are things that really make us unhappy and so.

The advice is that we wanna.

Could increase slick little burst of positive emotion throughout our day -- great strategies for doing that number one expressed gratitude and appreciation that does go a long way absolutist lots of research that shows that if you expressed gratitude if you appreciate your spouse.

Your health and opportunities.

You'll be happier yet that's a great lesson you need to teach your kids should not be optimistic about the future don't dwell on the past that's hard.

But it's a winner if you -- and absolutely we do not one that we don't want Obama -- who -- -- really strive towards goals in the future that's what's associated with happiness yes and you say also not afford this is such a good one to remember help others how does that bring -- -- you know it's amazing if -- hundred dollars you'd be happier if you -- it on someone else that on yourself you know we help others.

They reciprocate they appreciate you you feel look at good person these are great lessons and again the book is the myths and happiness great book -- thanks so much for saying thank you very much we appreciate.

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