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Comedian Lisa Lampanelli is here.
Making your first appearance until -- friends and she's going to be at the Apollo on January -- but this is -- protectionist and as you said it's about doing radio on this show absolutely not about the Apollo January 30 minute.
Never did cigarettes are back comfort tickets -- care don't I care about that lives are certainly not call -- crazy woman fat.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- To make me finish only has to do is call me a B and hit me in the thing with a -- right that is sexual maybe I -- know why I didn't think we get a -- that -- Allen met her I had no idea.
Lance Armstrong yet I you don't you don't get involved and is it depresses you you'll those I don't watch this knows it depresses me but that I didn't seal that Lance Armstrong clip.
He is the most unlikable guy my idea it's horrible how Twitter followers is this guy -- he's got three after this thing happen -- is gonna -- friend to my god he's nasty but what about the fact that we you'll apologize in this country select athletes.
And we expect a second chance President Clinton got that second.
Sexual about every age and I make fun of everybody nobody escapes during Lisa Lampanelli show.
Let's get -- comics feel they have to say they're sorry for a joke.
If -- jokes offensive it's meant to make a point so that's why get mad when these four guys like Tracy Morgan all these people ought to apologize for same some horrible supposedly -- goes back to dice clay was probably the biggest one -- cry -- -- -- -- not good -- not a good they will wind up having a disease in their -- -- to that but it certainly coming back so she looked over a 100 and -- -- that was awesome -- Well I'd been dieting and exercising for fifty years and it didn't work fifty yeah I have no will power cell.
I -- to my husband Jimmy.
Let's get this weight loss surgery and this way it's gonna force us to diet and exercise that -- so weak -- we had to be forced to deal basically.
So it's amazing I lost a hundred he lost 855 and have you altered your diet at all on -- -- you have to at least stream you literally eat a cup and a half of food today.
A day that so now it's our job to keep it off do you remember rocky three.
I guess I do right.
Do you remember how ferocious Mr.
T was in the beginning to -- him great that's -- medium right destroyed rocky but that when he became champion became civilized rights are you worried as you look even more beautiful than ever before -- have to hunt and a round.
You gonna lose that edge -- -- go to that anger itself needing.
There's so much -- -- -- still hate about my girls I'm horrible I am I'm going through menopause and I have a lot of flaws and I -- anger -- ever because I can't.
-- -- -- Great so so I still I take out horse on the audience great in -- -- For you to vent on them how nuts is that by the way I have people who call me up on my -- -- can I please.
Pay extra to sit up front -- be made fun I don't understand the psychology.
Either strong self hate her strong self love but who cares I get paid anyway you know people used its first guy I still do that was Don -- love him he is one of my heroes.
And I'll tell you somebody's 83 the guy still doing well right of -- coffins and right -- you -- Mo and I want everybody.
You -- -- factory and act anymore gigs for you and acted that's the end and that's the compassion catapulted you in your career yes it will land theorized it adds so at least at least she's going to -- he talked to comedians that they don't put news.
In their stand up.
They no news good I guess in the morning get up when they want you -- -- if you are -- I could put usually am in his show like this right staring at that he seemed extremely handsome host in this Tiffany blue tie I'm a little worried because that was nice.
I don't know so and I hear about and don't worry -- area.
But it might take.
And so exactly.
So a lot of people saw you nationally.
As you do it thousands at a time in your stadium against -- And the last that you sold at the Rose Bowl I.
I don't know radio city musical -- which is fantastic can only hope it's like red crescent street I was I was promoting you know I actually knew -- didn't sell -- a 1101000.
He's very nice of you to -- -- we had to bring back Richard prior to get 20000 -- that and he lived in that area immediately even actually needed or fair.
But listen Lisa you do this but a lot of people remember you on celebrity -- yes that was insane what did he do for you knew you were so aggressive use such a person -- you overwhelmed this year so I will tell yeah I don't hold back.
I'm going -- Mann applause and they all heard what I had to say and this Donald Trump treated me very good he like the honesty and people love him or hate him but you gotta admit at least he -- honesty and kept me in the border on him.
I kind a lot -- only because I don't care what he says I don't I don't love what he says but I do like that he's a charitable guy I've done saint -- charity for him.
His show helped me a 130000.
Dollars for my charity the men's health crisis and after I took my 25%.
Those gays got a lot of help you and you are not a game and not big not any more Russia during the -- operations that -- I want you here.
You fighting with a model I am very hilly and a dummy OK yeah.
First of can you bring them behind the scenes -- yeah behind the scenes.
Do we -- -- -- -- go to the courtroom today and yet -- -- you know you live off live unscripted situation right.
We will take -- -- and they take on or you -- I always said I I'll take on the stupid ones because I -- the hot hot one the hot one was on there who was my best friend on the joke.
I don't even see who's good look at who's bad look at I just -- hard you -- and how Smart you are so I just go.
The stupid ones and not a golfer you are Smart but that was pretty apparent I'm pretty -- intelligent and trying to I went to Harvard and didn't get kicked down -- six weeks and reduce the exact -- I act has actually -- your life.
Got into Harvard when I didn't graduate program there I -- with the here is Diana Mendoza and you go and -- it -- cut 20% this company.
And professional and I'm very surprised how.
She isn't an unknown ourselves doesn't respect herself and she has so many security issues to deal with an invented people -- to do with her.
I have meant nothing if -- I kept it quiet at any of these.
All at US telling -- I'm I'm so if -- out of -- you and got it I am sick of and you know what have you doing -- and -- a little.
Pitch I don't like being lied about I am courtroom and I give credit when credit's -- the fact that she -- in my ear you're too stupid to even -- -- my act that proves dead from here around.
The guest spot you're going down this universe.
I can't take this.
Think yourself if you are -- usual I -- And he got tired -- that's how tired I am emotional I don't ever on this promotion because -- as comics we normal range of emotion but yes she got fired that day and I'm not happy about it but yes I am yes I.
No but all real -- All real emotion -- hell yeah I can't -- I just -- -- -- as those girls I'll be honest with you they are about as useful as Tampa on a Betty -- house okay.
I'm nobody needs that you know what I actually -- -- useful you gotta stop there I try but you can't I got that -- McGovern and that is part of the reason everyone is talking about and -- your -- human in January 30 at 8 o'clock.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- But we have a lot of pockets instantly we certainly do thank god for technology -- Japanese so far she's been very nice to me for that -- -- -- they protect.
He's got Lisa Lampanelli is here we have -- with her as well as I will tell her in the break about -- certain Notre Dame linebacker.
Who has fictional girlfriend and she -- Would you -- are you -- if you fictional girlfriend dies or you angry are you upset I hope not.
-- -- -- -- Yeah yeah.
With the knowledge base that you have been trying to boss around someone.
Who is doing the test for you I had to -- -- -- -- the world wants.
I am trying to win this for you please let me write these words and that was very -- sir I didn't snap on her until -- -- in front of your son.
-- wrote the song.
And Lisa's been allowed the minute somebody lies or misrepresents me I started thinking that -- a vicious animal -- -- absolutely attacked the what you wanna go home we can go now.
-- -- -- At the scene from there Prentice -- at Toronto's Sarah literally jumped off his head at that point -- repay what I just listen to what was going all -- -- it was a music task were Rihanna ready jingle.
It's Clay Aiken who is a fantastic singer and songwriter.
And I split the guys split the task he broke then you music I wrote the lyrics and she had.
The woman had lied and said clay did the whole thing when she knew I -- half of it.
But look -- water on the bridge.
It was all for charity and for latest watch Donald -- had every day and try to figure out what was going on up there hey you know without a -- of best asset is what these kids.
I think it's they're they're fantastic Baylor shill or they're nice beautiful mumble -- Eddie said to me.
I really deserve no credit to in my life -- that's nice that he admits that what they all look up to on and you just rarely -- guys especially for a guy.
Right that what works twenty hours a day seven days a week you really happy when he's working -- completely.
Re they seem really well adjusted to me at least they were amazing and -- chair looking -- so Lisa weird as you -- So called anger and insult to come from where are you well adjusted -- normal upbringing who want Catholic school okay Italian parents allowed in my family I'm a client want to -- that's how I it's not -- and yet it's like going you know just a lot of that kind of stuff and also you know we all do have our spirits and when -- went to college I had a horrible time I hated it and I just have a lot of anger and -- myself and I try to get better.
I'm still big screamer -- south -- -- confined to the stage I'm okay right now.
Are people in your life when he -- for Thanksgiving Christmas Day came easier comedian make be laugh my dad and I put all of them guess what get in the kitchen and shut up because I cannot -- it's a job well like your funny for media and press and -- a stage and then I'm just quiet normal.
Right I don't.
No offense I don't -- -- normal all -- in a way.
But does your family think -- have -- always thought you were funny we your family -- quarter when you have to do this yell at my mother's gangster ma'am I'm most tough.
You know she she honestly is and she was mad that I didn't get voted class clown in high school she almost -- to -- protest that Michelle Sweeney got voted instead.
The more I'll get that woman back and guess what -- Michelle Sweeney now -- Ahmad fox those.
Right -- drastic the best thing about it I'm kidding it's we -- get her phone number I know you know how to get old reliable option is dead yeah I was beginning to doubt he'll bat but actually you can use that.
-- always press always material so ate it the way I understand if you I was in about a material and working on in size though most of the crafting joked that if he -- do Lisa Lampanelli is going to be successful.
She's got to either an audience and make those comments extemporaneously.
Exactly if I knew what that word meant I would say yes -- but -- are you just -- just hundreds.
I'll just say -- hop right no Richard you have to on the fly say what do I got in the audience.
How might Senegal and I love that because they like is -- they pay extra sit in the front they wanna be -- out when I went to see you -- I want him to -- me it's an error right away but you have to be securing yourself oh yes and left yourself I ticket I always seen interviews -- you can't take a joke sit in the back.
Although now that I lost the weight I may run off that damn stage and come find you know how ironic if I would have believed -- release it let's use the word damn.
Yes -- that is underline it yeah.
He hears that thing yet or not feeling it when he on the stage yes you have a lot of stuff going on the train was -- The -- who takes a multi how dare you -- and go limo was -- a little is like the stretch that the -- deaths as they relate.
I didn't sometimes you're not feeling it but the second and it ice it sounds like a cliche but I swear to god I've never gotten on a stage and after one -- have been like on man.
The audience is there to see you it's theater there's 2006000.
People they're so happy.
That you can't help but be happy -- right no -- do you long for the days when people didn't know you and you had to cut your teeth on and hated it.
Now I'd much rather get a standing ovation when I walk -- to the stage I love that write these those people are there to see you they don't dare -- 'cause they know this is what I do for a living -- -- -- the club days people would take a chance and that's how I got good at it.
Now nobody dares it's awesome have been afraid of view but how could a woman who's so direct and in so confident.
Be driven to tears on apprentice because not every -- Elway on the stage like -- working twenty hours a day six reals or week.
Real work and so stupid I thought it was a real job and took it seriously a win for my charity and also let's admit that's only a small part of it there -- I -- -- -- Passed all the stupid people -- I have his first I.
And -- got fifteen million people watching -- exactly so I think unimpeded on CNBC that's true yeah I wanted to make it to the final four which thank god I did so what -- happen to comedy in this.
We grew up in the seventies.
Where would you would you you won't it's 61 okay six -- not.
-- with him.
Loved it RJR's -- best so while -- Why are we less tolerant now that we were in the seventy's at that we are supposed to be evolving is that we're going back would be more -- -- -- -- all coming out of race riots and Archie Bunker than number one TV still they don't get irony they don't understand it anymore like the I'd blame white people like I don't really that's when -- I know I don't answer back.
Is like white women who have kids and suddenly their politically correct track like it or break or two years ago and now they had -- kids and suddenly -- gluten free and healthy snack and a bike helmet and a lot of people at home reasoning and that's me.
-- Like I'm lighten up a little bit it's comedy I'll say I'm a comic not a senator -- never apologize for anything and I can explain myself united were now Franken and unfortunately -- and oh god now now now right.
So -- are noticing what I notice.
The EU Sammy Davis junior kiss with Archie Bunker -- talks about -- -- Jews in a very.
-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- I'm normally I'd build on it but I can't hit it and had -- I don't I don't live with a -- city.
We broke up so on what I'm wondering is do you see is going back to that in not leaving -- -- -- family and reruns I hope we're going back to that.
But I think there's a reason I don't have a sitcom like that does not protect the language -- night's news every -- you can imagine in my stand up to make a point to make the point that if you say these words it's really ignorant it's like urging the urge you bunker -- the model.
So I don't know if we'll ever have a TV show like that again it's a shame because he was to -- the best character and said the most about anything that was going -- at the time what -- this will never be used to be polish -- all and a -- you think you're not a whole lot of jokes right now because we couldn't make -- of polish people -- -- a quarter -- -- all the -- you want because -- quarter pole of his fold in every to -- -- -- everybody wants to be made -- -- I'm telling -- -- I -- I used to sign autographs after the -- I would have.
I had a guy come to me because I'm Arab what did you do any Arab -- I got I don't share over my flight.
'cause he was mad I didn't include him right I think inclusion is what's not racist you don't Amy if I -- -- or you I'm races right.
So fine is so -- so we're coming to cripple job that's fantastic and I remember we iso one stand up and he was actually a wheelchair so we do instead -- he said hey.
Thanks to the handicapped does still play it would ability to do land the plane how much room -- hey I and then again yet it does defuse it and PS the handicap solves the best thing ever ribbon like those -- like you said -- you should not Beagle in their city.
So anyway yeah I don't -- right.
I little on the way around -- -- -- but it annoys me.
Handicapped parking it will never market but expectant mother parking I will stick out my -- and take I don't care not even look at.
There -- she's looked over a 100000 never been funny and it's not even noon.
The media Lisa Lampanelli won't watch you and go live to see you January 30 big market Harlem.
And follow you wherever you go I insult comic dot com is -- -- game that you -- -- is no problem fine and you really enjoyed.
I actually headed back to back him.
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