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Is the publisher the book you or the wife of Ted Haggard.
Obviously which is what you're writing about and and you know I guess you've had to -- barbs you know from all kinds of people including people like me who made fun of the whole situation at the time and now now -- think it's become a lot more serious.
That you went and wrote this book.
And if you talk about it as you do and you able to forgive is such a remarkable thing.
Well I was I was very happy to -- to tell our story because I think -- is that there is -- misinformation.
That I wanted to correct and I'm planning to tell.
What a remarkable story that says that to human story it's a story about healing and faith and love and -- -- from your perspective what happened.
Well of course and it and for me it started with the crisis since that.
I discovered -- my husband was struggling with and when he told me that there -- -- the to the allegations that -- leveled against him.
That was it that was a real shot.
We -- -- from a huge earlier in the me in your marriage he had had a gay relationship.
He had not he's never had a gay relationship he has had -- he has struggled with traveling dots.
That were related to a childhood trauma where he was sexually abused by an adult man.
And in that bad it would appear and has five from time to time and he it led to -- -- temptations and he eventually succumbed to some of those temptations.
I say if you thought -- that it gets in behind him at the time that this crisis.
Came up correct definitely it was a very early in our marriage that he shared with me some of his traveling that said that he went and and spoke with pastors counselors.
And I felt his the problem with something I really didn't understand at that time the gravity of what he was you're in your lawyer's office when he came forward with a confession -- We had done -- lawyer's office suggests to discuss how we should position ourselves with -- allegations that were coming from my tents at the time.
I had no idea when we locked in that my has -- was getting ready to contest him.
So Mike Jones was this male prostitute claimed that they had done crystal meth together and that they have had a a sexual relationship he.
Yet here he dead now out there and there were a lot of false hits and his story he exaggerated and -- actually took a lie detector test.
Which proves that he would isn't being inconsistent and it's been speaking and that he wasn't altogether -- -- And -- and said hey Chad deception I guess this what they can tell from these polygraphs.
My husband and took several polygraphs which said that he was being completely truthful and -- -- What did he tell you in the lawyer's office.
He told me that this that some of the allegations were true and of course I I developed that story in my request that felt like for me could you tell me who tell us tell our audience a little bit about what -- felt like at that moment.
When well as I walked into our lawyer's office he told me why he tell me to go on -- and speak with cat I had separated from them for a few minutes to get a bathroom and I came and he closed the door behind me and I tests felt the ten in the Graham had changed and I felt.
The life to straining Tammy and I was that bad -- news that I did your collection.
I was definitely blind sided I was devastated when my has been looked at me with.
The saddest sight I've ever seen him have and -- out -- these allegations are true what did you say back.
Well I do you remember that the first words out of my mouth the where.
You are you know.
Because -- kidnapped -- that together we've been married for how many years have been at that time we've been married for attorney and -- five kids or five kids.
A a really great marriage.
By -- standards and and really left our lives everything.
I felt is that we were at the top of arcane everything -- going tomorrow and review.
Say now in retrospect there was a level of intimacy or some kind of -- that may be at the time he didn't realize was that.
That's true and it wasn't I was -- -- that physical intimacy because we -- had a very healthy sexual relationship.
If the -- life kids and a great great sexual relationship that.
Bad I felt as though there -- a while.
That I couldn't get a crass and really knowing my has been that there is a part of him that I can reach and and I had this belonging that I just funny to now my hands and I -- to know him on deeper levels and -- that was.
That was something I just learn to live with and attributed to how -- -- -- lives.
Well so then -- -- was a top of -- evangelist he was head of an evangelical association.
He he had -- -- a church of what 26014141000.
Certainly well known known me know in the media.
And embraced him he's well known evangelical community so this was not a back bench pastor this is someone who was quite well -- so you have -- Not the public a program to go along we'll leave personal stuff yet again.
That's too -- here as well -- and well loved and so I think it was a shock on many levels for many people and and had to -- had some anti gay stance is correct politically and he'd come out against gay marriage and he was not particularly known as being pro -- You know my husband was never anti gay he was -- church was open to any Betty -- every -- and my husband was known for being in theory.
Open minded very kind hearted loving merciful compassionate person he's been portrait -- differently in the media since the crisis that that was not ever his position with people and also the media room.
Well they got Ron that he had been -- -- homosexual relationship with a gay man for three years that was not true.
And as a member of the congregation.
And now this -- earlier this OK Mike Jones -- -- doesn't -- do you hope to gain that moved in leveled these accusations.
-- just that description of him as ever being an anti gay hateful preacher.
My has been with the dairy and dairy kind hearted he -- all people as.
As him process and that we need to be compassionate.
And patient as -- -- -- -- -- was on coming forward because once I realized who this man was Ted Haggard I realize that he was a hypocrite said Mike Jones because he was preaching against.
Being -- Yes and that that was what he believed about Ted I think he had a misconception about.
Ted stances Ted was the president at the National Association of Evangelicals at them time which is what gave him a public voice in the media.
And and definitely at that time.
Big is that game Mary -- Issue was huge chain collar -- and -- had taken the position that he felt that the definition of marriage was it was the for a man and a woman but he was never anti day.
You and immediately forgave him it -- in fact in the book go to talk about how that very night you had.
Relations with the your husband.
The group have relations that I will describe what happened -- fifth Lopez as I as I came in target and then -- Chris I had this relevant mentions going and I felt that group policy and pain.
Just anger betrayal all of those things -- going on.
And it was just still swirling in me when I got into bed that night and in the darkness of the -- and the quiet I felt my has been -- -- his hand to me.
And in that moment I had to make my decision and I take his --
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