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Wanna continue with that got caught with our panel who's just kind of -- in here as we've been talking with Cleveland.
First of all -- doctor Alex McFarland who -- -- religion expert talk radio host is unique but -- it comes to as far as the buyout led the handwritten on the Internet but he has satellite from -- Vladimir -- whether government house here need to be you're -- and -- -- the archer psychiatrist and doctor Al dale -- dot com.
Available dale the editors or -- -- we don't they.
Actor and OK I don't remember but I -- in my mind I said the I don't -- -- and activity Williamson author of that processing life's moments through -- for the soul and he she's just now a wonderful thing.
Woman we'd like -- here because his wonderful things -- -- she can she can hold her own against you know.
Thank you started yeah.
Hey how we -- -- -- look like Ryan Reynolds I don't know I mean he just.
And -- I have I just have that -- And we'll probably -- -- discussed today in even did you see the thing about the arranged marriages yes and you know this worked out really well for them yes and but you can't help.
Also thinking about the thirteen year old in California with -- -- that -- -- when senator Pakistan now obviously it's a different situation she she does have a choice then there is that Jesse vendor.
Thirteen years old -- that the parents apparently wanted to send her to Pakistan she escaped she.
Relic from home apparently.
And her parents -- Authorities have put this to say and we think she's been abducted her she ran away from someone who course -- FaceBook or something I mean a lot.
So on the story is this a step father.
At least it hasn't seen in and then bonds but -- bit morbid details because.
One of the things that the ship them with my mother Melissa Bender said to the leases that.
Apparently Jesse didn't want to -- a two month vacation.
A family vacation who takes a vacation for two months I now during school AAF I have strong thoughts.
Well earlier but yeah well -- first -- -- the role of the parent.
Is to teach your child.
To grow up to become a mature responsible adult and make decisions.
And make decisions about who you're gonna -- and -- new York and America.
And so I think that arranged marriages.
Basically take that decision making away from the child.
And put it all the parents and the parents may.
No -- they actually -- but that's how we learn yeah we can make mistakes when they married the wrong person and have to.
Move on but that's a growing community.
I have issues with this arrangement I don't -- -- definitely -- -- we've got to sound -- from the mother Melissa vendor talking about the situation let's -- let's listen to this.
Please -- you can let my baby pool just become that it couldn go to anybody the law enforcement.
Any -- you can call 91 line you know we're all here really look -- We're out looking all DN 93 BB.
Okay now that we know what was going on what happened is that I -- -- this disgusting.
Think you know -- there there were some studies several years ago that showed that a lot of arranged marriages in other cultures had a fairly high success rate in a fairly -- divorce rate but.
What the study showed was -- -- it wasn't necessarily that the partners.
Fell in love and and really you know cared for each other is people in western societies might fall in love.
That there was great -- societal pressure great family -- pressure to remain.
And so -- There are people from non westernized countries are saying see arranged marriages work.
But it's not necessarily that it's in the best emotional or mental health for the participants it's just that there's a lot of cultural pressure to remain.
In fact that this girl would come run away to protect her future and to go or her own decision making process shows that.
That this this just is not gonna work in in America and westernized countries.
My bat so I mean obviously -- -- all and -- -- -- -- -- -- the -- -- situation where they actually went into this marriage eyes wide open.
Doing their own sort of restart it was considered yeah.
Well the reason you right now so I mean I'm I'm thinking about the culture and that's why I asked if the father is from a different culture and the mother of course it's from here.
So she decided to lie based on the fact that she want it to what.
Please her husband because -- not -- part of the stepfather.
Yes he's that's not he's -- like stat but is that their culture it's not hurt but -- to come up and lie I mean about her own daughter.
I I think that's -- -- -- a lot of movement and crying.
Crying well I'm okay here's another when the camera there and saying oh please come back -- or you know exactly what's going on and that's my friend let's.
This -- raise an issue about marriage that is so crucial to why a lot perhaps why a lot of -- marriages -- which is that they focus so much on the falling in love aspect of the marriage.
And like you said falling when he phoned her yet again that theft -- percent of those today and -- a lot of personality or small exit.
We've -- disaster but he's also saying that the marriage took a lot of like.
But it's really understand it mirrors of me and I understand -- and how they feel about.
That's how really how -- knew about -- and the value system all of these things really are objective standards that they can actually find out without having to.
When you you know there are not I think it America and in much of the west of -- we've lost some.
A real understanding -- and appreciation for what we're just supposed to be a mean originally marriage is given by god.
Is not a consumer based on social contract that but a -- -- and and it's a kind -- really -- in the in the old testament -- when god made -- covenant with Abraham.
They took these doves and and sacrifice these dogs and walk between the pieces and essentially what they were saying was made that be what happens to me if -- default on my end of the bargain.
And I really believe as as a minister -- the bloodthirsty lawyer comes well.
Does that -- sore -- -- -- it would be sharks -- -- -- but that's a bit on marriage is a covenant it's a combat climate that I love and marriage is that a commitment.
To meet another person's needs.
We waited so easy here though to not believe in marriage I mean based on the things that we do I mean now you can go and get a divorce wife and no fault divorce you -- fault divorce I mean we made it so easy for people not to believe in magic.
And then right now I mean not saying anything really against the media but what are they really promoting.
They are promoting the sex they are promoting -- marriages they -- promoting having children without being married.
So I mean that's the type of thing that we're delusional -- right now.
And from my perspective as a psychiatrist I think the number one problem is the -- and -- our country is run -- And I think social -- is a big part of that because social media is all about look at me me.
Maybe it'll -- -- -- out at all -- they may look okay on -- citizen but we call individuals of -- when we look at it as in light of something that's actually pretty good.
Then IE you have the right to pursue happiness and part of that -- this is my -- There's that but there is a healthy narcissus and then there's a pathological narcissism and and we -- into the have a -- instead of his media -- -- what does that mean there was a study.
A University of Michigan and a few years ago look at college -- after 2000 more 2000 and they evaluated empathy -- was down 40%.
From graduates after 2000 and -- -- empathy is a direct result of not being on the system relating to the thoughts and feelings of other requisite laws of this lack of -- well I mean -- all kinds of theories about -- the social media is on.
Visiting a part of it but 'cause -- You're disconnected from your personal communication it's all electronic and the other thing that's really a big.
Part of the -- thing that I find so interesting about President Obama I mean the one thing he said he got from his grandmother.
Was -- To understand -- -- and I think that is the core of his relationship with -- Because they understand empathy but most the time here we do not it's ironically about.
With -- and horses -- of the and I think the two do not go hand in I mean if you're narcissistic.
You cannot deal for others because you're too -- thinking about yourself now what I want when I want you not care about you and -- thanks to get.
The information -- and an ethic that that we need to pass on to young people is selflessness.
And done the study united theological studies sociological studies show that there's a lot of -- way.
In caring about others and less about myself right did there's a little bit -- that's measured every few years -- the national happiness index.
An issue that the people who have some of the greatest life fulfillment the greatest happiness not to mention one of the greatest predictors of financial success and rising out of poverty it's a stable family structure which comes out of a stable committed.
And so while I I think that down the arranged marriages really undermines something that we need to a firm which is.
Good stable loving committed selfless.
Mayor -- it's.
I think that he arranged marriage ideas actually kind of looking for that to me even from an I don't know these -- that this Pakistani man.
I don't know the situation.
But in my mind I keep thinking that perhaps he's part of the -- What all of us really want which is some kind of pure stable.
Marriage securities -- -- -- and that's a western society does not -- that would over the Atlantic.
Comedy movies without the media that you -- children are exposed and pretty much going up -- well we.
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